Day 12 IVF and Gratitude

I triggered last night with my HCG shot, and my ER will be at 9am tomorrow. I have to be there at 8am, and Archie has to drop off his sample at 7:30am, which means my girlfriend, B, gets the pleasure of having Jack at 7am (God love that woman because there aren't many friends I think I could ask for a favor like that!).

I have to say that through all of this, my mom, Archie, and some awesome friends and blogger friends have been so supportive. K was willing to go to Parent's Day with Jack as a fill in for us if need be, and this meant so much to me that Jack wouldn't be alone, and yet K would be leaving her boxer puppy with bad seperation anxiety at home alone to help us out. B is willing to get up at the crack of dawn to take Jack tomorrow morning and to tote him around on a playdate. Br was willing to take Jack on top of her twin boys, one of which has special needs, and she is always saying she'll take him anytime-God love her. L has just been nothing but supportive, and though she felt bad that she wasn't more available (she has infant twins), she's been praying constantly for us and is always just a phone call or text away. Jen who gave me advice on what helped her during her last cycle, and has been praying for us as well has been awesome. And my mom, while she doesn't understand what half of what I'm saying with regards to our IVF means, has let me vent, cry, talk through issues, and that's been great for me. My faithful blogger followers have been nothing but supportive, and the girls from my previous IVF/IF groups that I've stayed in touch with have been my cheerleader squad. You guys rock, and regardless of how this cycle turns out, I want you to know I feel so blessed to have you all in my life.

So here is the plan. We should be home around lunchtime (I think), and if I'm not too groggy or tired, I'll post to let you guys know how many eggs we had. I won't have a fertilization report until Friday. Embryo Transfer (ET) could take place on Sunday (day 3), or Tuesday (day 5). I'm thinking we will transfer on Sunday simply because we've never had great quality embryos. Jack was the result of a day 3 transfer with 2 so-so embryos, and last time, all of our embryos were abnormal. My hope is that we have enough to choose from this time like with our first cycle that we don't have to worry about the abnormal ones. I'm a bit nervous about the possibility of a day 5 transfer, just because our first cycle all of our leftover embryos that we were growing out to day 5 and hoping to freeze fizzled out. I'm just afraid tha the embryology lab would say that they think they can make it to day 5 and then we end up with nothing. I realize that these people make these decisions all the time, this is what they do, and I need to trust them. It's just like when people trust me to take care of their sick babies, trust me to give them accurate and correct info and not to steer them wrong. And let's be honest, God has made this cycle so much easier than the first two. The first cycle we felt like we had so much riding on it, it was our best and only chance at starting a family, it was threatened to be cancelled numerous times thanks to my hyperstimulation, and it was just so darn stressful. The second one I didn't trust to work the entire time, and when I finally let my guard down things hit the fan.

This time, and maybe the acupuncture has something to do with my stress level, but I feel like I've been more calm, and I think alot of that has to do with praying. I wasn't as faithful the last two times, and I've still got a long way to go, but I really do feel like I've been more at peace this cycle. That's not to say there haven't been stressful occurences (hello Parent Day conflict), but He has provided for us to be able to work things out beautifully, and I am so grateful.

B asked me today how I felt. I could tell her 100% honestly that I felt good. I felt excited and confident with how things are going. For someone who second guesses everything, this is huge for me. I just have a good feeling, and I hope it doesn't stop for a good, oh...10 months!

Thanks to all my peeps out there for your support. Love you guys!