32 Week OB Appointment

My OB appointment was on Wednesday afternoon. It went well. I lost 2 pounds, so in total now I am up 2 pounds from my 10 week appointment. It's not for lack of eating-trust me, I'm eating! It may just be a fluke with yet a third different scale.

Otherwise, Charlie's heartbeat sounded perfect and where it should be. I have to get my hematocrit (red blood cell count) and thyroid levels rechecked before my next appointment on December 14th. I also am scheduled to have a growth scan in the office right before my next appointment. I told her the results of our ultrasound 2 weeks ago, but they need it to be documented which is fine. To be honest, I'm not quite sure why I'm having this ultrasound since she told me I wouldn't have any more unless medically necessary since insurance wouldn't cover it. No, I didn't ask why. I figured it was because of my poor weight gain. To be frank, I don't care either way, I get to see my boy again!

So all in all, good, boring appointment. That's how it should be!

Charlie's 4D Ultrasound

This wasn't an easy ultrasound. Charlie is breech (not worried-he has a few more weeks to turn), had his back to us, and his hands in front of his face initially. After a trip to the bathroom, some jumping up and down, and shaking of my rear (no kidding), he was finally moving. He then had his hands mostly under his chin, his foot next to his face, and was hiding behind my placenta. He still wanted to sleep, so we have some video on DVD (if my computer would work right) of him grimacing, looking like he let out a whine, and then opening and closing his mouth. He has cute cheeks, kissable lips, and I think looks like Archie's side of the family. Here are some pics! I can't wait to meet him in person!

21 weeks 5 days

It only took one stick (and alot of pain as she fished around) to get my IV on Wednesday. Then it bruised throughout the day. I kept on top of flushing the IV more frequently in an effort to hopefully keep it through today, but I could tell when I flushed it on Thursday morning and it was so sluggish that it wasn't going to last that one more day. So I hung my last bag of IV fluids yesterday, pulled that sucker out when it was done, and called my OB today to ask her to discontinue my IV fluids. She and my urologist were both on board with this plan or I would have been calling to ask for a PICC.

While I had her on the phone, I asked if she'd gotten any official report on the ultrasound we had at 18 weeks. I wanted to know if they had cleared the baby's spine, or if perhaps we should schedule another look. She said that they cleared all three areas of the spine (cervical, thoracic, and lumbar), and that if they didn't have a good look, that they would have suggested further studies. It was read by a real radiologist, not just the tech who did the ultrasound. So this gives me a relief.

In other news, Jack finally got to feel the baby move once on Monday night. Since then, the baby has decided he likes to play games with his big brother, and everytime he's active and Jack puts his hand on my belly, the baby is perfectly still. Take Jack's hand off, and the baby moves. What a booger!

Now, I need to vent. As a NICU nurse at some point you will be the resus/triage nurse responsible for responding to calls in L&D. I'm pregnant, but not handicapped. I have no problem with going up for a resus for a c-section baby who may need help, or a meconium baby or any preemie. I did it throughout my pregnancy with Jack. I ran into a problem then, only because I looked at 30 weeks and thought, that is perfect, might need a little help breathing initially, but should do just fine. I was 29 weeks pregnant when we got a resus call for a 30 weeker. I went up for it like any other resus call, but something wasn't right with this baby. We couldn't get the baby's oxygen levels up, we couldn't get a breathing tube in the baby, anesthesia tried one of their devices and no matter what we did, we couldn't save this baby. One of the nurse practitioners was on this resus with me, and I didn't take it well when all was said and done. I was a week away from being where this baby was. One week. And we couldn't save this baby. Why not? Turns out the baby had a weird anatomy that no one knew about in utero, and there wasn't anything we would have been able to do to change what happened.

Now, come back to present day. I'll be 22 weeks pregnant on Sunday. I KNOW my baby isn't viable at this point. They wouldn't even try to resus my baby if I delivered next week, and I know that, and I'm fine with it because I know what the likelihood of problems would be for my child, and that's not a life. I am the resus nurse tonight. No biggie. It's part of the job. My charge nurse tells me there is a 23 weeker upstairs in active labor. Ok, no biggie. I know that with any 23 weeker, the baby may be too small to resus, or the resus may not go well and may end up in a full code, or the baby may just have the typical resus for that gestation, come down to our unit to be admitted, and go through all the normal stuff a 23 weeker would be expected to go through. The nurse practitioner (different from the one I was with in the above scenario), and the fellow don't think I should go up. They think we need to be realistic about what we're asking people to do. Seriously, I know my baby isn't viable right now, and it wouldn't be my first or tenth 23 week resus I went on. They want someone who isn't so close to the gestational age to go. I asked another nurse in my room who has an easy assignment if she'd mind going up for that one, that I'll handle the rest of them. She doesn't want to go because she MIGHT be pregnant. Are you freaking kidding me? And if you are indeed pregnant, do you think you won't have be resus for the next 36 weeks? That's not how our job works. I would totally get this if it meant being exposed to something that's not safe in pregnancy like varicella, herpes, toxoplasmosis, CMV, etc. I'm just frustrated. This is a person who in general, I usually get along with, but I am really irritated. She could be the nurse admitting this baby and not get a say in it at all, but you can't go up for a fifteen minute resus? Luckily there are a few other nurses who know how the job works who are willing to go up for this baby. At least I can count on most of my coworkers for good teamwork and support.

19 week Baby Update, Hurricane Irene, Grandmom's, and Earthquakes, Oh My!

It's been a few weeks since I posted. Just didn't have much going on really.

I've always wanted to go to California, a friend tried to convince me that San Diego is a great place to live. I could totally deal with the 70 degree temps year round and LOVE it, but they get those pesky wildfires and earthquakes which make me hesitant, not to mention I can only imagine the cost of living out there. I always wondered what it was like to be around when an earthquake strikes. Well, I got a little taste of it the other day. I can't say I was scared since I had no clue at the time that it was an earthquake. The east coast rarely gets them, but this one originated in Virginia (we're in MD), and was felt all the way up into Canada. We had just gone upstairs to take a nap, and had set Jack up at the foot of our bed with his DVD player. The bed started shaking and Archie and I looked at each other and then looked for Chance, our greyhound who had a seizure in the spring, but he wasn't in bed with us, so that couldn't be it. We thought it was our sleep number mattress malfunctioning because we kept hearing "clicking". Archie got out of bed and opened our bedroom door because Chance was crying in the hall. This, the dog who isn't disturbed by ANYTHING. We just kept looking at each other wondering what in the heck was going on. Then my mom called me from work to ask if we'd felt that. Oh! She said there was fire equipment outside of the hospital evacuating other buildings, and that they thought it was an earthquake. I got off the phone with her and found that I couldn't make any calls as cell service was disrupted, but I could get on facebook, and when I did, I saw that everyone else had seemed to feel the earth shake as well. We didn't have any pictures fall off the walls, or anything fall over, it wasn't that big of a deal, just interesting when you've never experienced anything like it. I'll bet our friends in California thought all the hyped up east coast people were pretty funny/ridiculous, but that would be like them getting hit with a tornado. Just not something you experience often.

Then, yesterday we got a little taste of Hurricane Irene. There was alot of damage from fallen trees in our area, and some power outages, but our family and home was unscathed. I had trouble sleeping last night with all of the wind and rain, but I'm happy to say our roof held up, and our sump pump did it's job so we didn't flood out our basement. We were supposed to go to Ocean City overnight last night and head home today, but that was obviously nixed. We got a phone call on Friday from our hotel telling us that they were evacuating everyone. So, no part of a vacation whatsoever this summer, but it is what it is.

Yesterday morning I got a forwarded email from my father, from his cousin who is the power of attorney for my grandmother in CT (he's in MD too). It seems that while we found out a month or so ago that her kidney function is declining (she has a history of kidney disease), and she is continuing to have problems with her blood pressure. Well, in this email, it turns out that on Wednesday when my grandmom went for her hair appointment, during the transfer from her wheelchair she got lightheaded and they helped her to the floor for her safety. Her legs which have been swollen even before her kidney function got worse, are worse yet, and her left leg is red and irritated. They started her on antibiotics. She's refusing to eat, even ice cream (normally a treat for her), and refusing to drink (including her cranberry juice-a favorite). His cousin is going back to check on her, and if she thinks it needs to be done, will ask the doc to reassess and possibly admit her to the hospital. The woman is in her 90's, and I know she won't live forever, but I wish it didn't have to be like this. Isn't a quick and painless death (like in your sleep) better than being sick for a long time, feeling miserable and finally succumbing to the illnesses? I'm just having a hard time even thinking about it.

On Thursday we had our big ultrasound to look at the baby's anatomy and gender. The baby has a 4 chamber heart which I am so happy about, and all of the vessels appear to be where they should be. The brain looked good, as well as the kidneys. Baby appeared to have all of it's fingers and toes, eyes, a nose, and cute little lips. We are having another boy! Jack said, "Oh, I really thought it was going to be a girl!" I explained that I think we all did, but now he'd have someone to play trains and cars with, and he has so much to teach his little brother about all of those things! He seemed ok with it after that.


The only thing that has me concerned about this ultrasound is that the baby wouldn't straighten out so they could make sure his spine wasn't curved. He was balled up and not very cooperative, and while they didn't see any major anomalies like spina bifida or anything like that, I'm worried. I'm worried that he didn't stretch out because he couldn't stretch out physically, maybe his spine won't allow him to do it. Which could lead to problems with his developing lungs. I'm sure everything is fine, but I may ask my OB if we could just take another look for my piece of mind, just of his spine. We'll see what she says. It's not like they could do anything about it in utero anyway, but I'd like to know what we're dealing with either way. The baby measured 19 weeks and 3 days, and my ultrasound was at 18 weeks and 4 days. I'm a little worried he'll be huge. I think Jack at 6 pounds 12 ounces did enough damage, I'd hate to think of what a bigger baby would do to me! I did ask my OB (knowing that my glucose test isn't until late October) if I needed to be worried about anything like gestational diabetes, and she said I'm not spilling glucose or ketones in my urine, so at this point she thinks we're ok for that. She said there can be up to a 10% error on the estimated size of the baby by ultrasound. Then she told me that her first baby was 6 pounds, her second was 8, and that by far, the 8 pound baby was so much easier on her body. That was reassuring. The ultrasound tech had said that they would probably do another ultrasound around 35-36 weeks to check the size of the baby prior to delivery, and that this is pretty standard now. That was news to me. The ultrasound I had with Jack at 19 weeks, was my last, they never checked for size and that was only 4 and a half years ago. I'll take it though.

I'm sure I'm worried over nothing, and I'm just not going to have two really easy, cooperative, flexible babies (my luck just isn't like that, and I got really lucky the first time with the whole easy baby bit), but I can't help but think about my little guy's ultrasound and that darn spine. We'll see what my OB says.

15 weeks 0 days

Today I am 15 weeks exactly. I do have a few things to report. As of Friday, if I hadn't thrown up, I would have made it 3 weeks. The fact that I almost made it that far, is great. I was so hopeful however to be able to be done with these IV's. A week and a half ago, I honestly thought I'd go to the OB appointment and be able to say I didn't need them. Then last week the nausea was back with a vengeance, late Wednesday night I started with a sore throat, by Thursday night was starting with a cough, and with the nasty cough, gagging. I've thrown up twice in the last 3 days, but honestly, I think alot of it has to do with the post nasal drip, and the coughing triggering it. I wasn't feeling great earlier in the week with the nausea, but I think I probably could have kept from throwing up, MAYBE. One morning I went to my mom's office to pick up Jack and told her I felt like I was going to throw up, and she told me to go do it in the bathroom before I got on the road. But the point is to NOT throw up, and I was bound and determined to keep it in as long as I could. Can't say I didn't try.

The acid reflux has also kicked up a notch. I remember toward the end of my pregnancy having to sleep sitting up on pillows in my bed because if I didn't I'd wake up choking on my own stomach acid in the middle of the night, not being able to breathe, and then throwing up. I'm not that bad yet. However, if I lay down, I'm in such bad pain it's ridiculous. Two tums (used to be my go-to) only cut it for about 10-15 minutes and then I'm back in pain again. Milk occassionally helps, it's hit or miss. I may try Maalox next. I don't want to be taking anything like zantac on a regular basis, I just want something for when it's really bad and Tums won't cut it.

I went to my OB appointment on Friday. She didn't measure me, or even palpate my abdomen to see what I was talking about, but she tells me that it's certainly not my uterus that I feel at my belly button. She said it's a fluke. I told her I can feel it plain as day. She assures me it's not, that my uterus is only a few inches above my pubic bone at this point, the only way it would be at my belly button at this point is if my dates were wrong (which we know they're written in stone, no mistaking that), or if I was pregnant with multiples which we also know I am not. So I have no idea what it is I can feel, but I will tell you that it stays mostly on my right side (where I felt the pop a few weeks ago with all that pain-she said that was probably ligaments stretching) and if I push on my right side, I can feel something on the inside (not on the outside) bulge over to the left. It also continues to rise in my abdomen, a few weeks ago this non-uterus was below my belly button and now it's not. No idea what it is if it's not my uterus, but I'll just take her word for it. She is the expert after all, not me!

She did doppler the baby's heartbeat which took a little work to find (maybe because she was looking right above my pubic bone and found it about an inch or two down from my belly button), and it was 149. It's getting lower and lower as the baby gets bigger. Not sure what that means for the gender. This baby started off in the high 160's, at our first trimester screen and ultrasound was at 157, and now is at 149. Crud, speaking of the first trimester ultrasound, I forgot to ask if she had my bloodwork back! I will call tomorrow. She told us to schedule our anatomy ultrasound and next OB appointment for 4 weeks. We will know whether this baby is a boy or a girl on August 25th!!!! We cannot wait.

I worked Totswap again this week, and again, I refused to buy anything for the baby. I saw a ton of cute stuff, but I really won't need many boy things if it is a boy because I saved most of the baby stuff and haven't sold it yet. However, if it's a girl, I already have images of cute little dresses, skirts and outfits swirling around in my mushy brain! The next Totswap sale is in October, so I will definitely be able to shop then.

If you haven't already, I have a poll on the right side of the blog for the baby's gender. You have just over 25 days left to vote, so please make sure you do!!!

Reassuring Update From the Fabulous Dr. A

I tried calling my OB's office yesterday, but all day long it was the answering service. Guess they took an extra long holiday weekend! But I did finally get through after lunch today and left a message with Dr. A's secretary. In case I haven't mentioned enough how much I love my OB (seriously, I couldn't wait to be pregnant and one of the reasons was so I could go see this woman every couple of weeks), I really do. She is always perky and upbeat, even when you're sitting there feeling like you might just puke on her shoes. She'll even tell you her own stories from when she was pregnant in the hopes of making you feel better. In true fashion she didn't let me down today.

She just called me back, and I explained that I hadn't taken my morning dose of progesterone on Friday because I knew I was having an exam and swabs done (I'm late on my annual exam), and didn't want it to interfere with that, so I had held off, only to crash when I got home from being up for 22 hours, and forgetting to take my evening dose. I explained that Saturday morning I had heavier spotting which did lighten up throughout the day after taking my progesterone. I wanted to know how much spotting I should expect after I finish the progesterone next Tuesday, and at what point I should be concerned enough to call. She told me that since Dr. M had seen a spot on ultrasound that he thought might be where the spotting was coming from it was probably a subchorionic bleed, and that that clot was going to have to leak as it liquified and come out one way or another, and that honestly the missing the progesterone on Friday and spotting that ensued was probably just a fluke because the clot has to dissolve and come out anyway. She said that the progesterone takes over between 8 and 10 weeks, so the progesterone I'm taking now (or lack thereof, I should say) isn't what caused the spotting, it's probably just this clot dissolving.

As far as when I should be concerned-if it's red bleeding like a period, then I need to be seen for sure. She said she's there Monday to Friday and if I need a sanity check, she'd be happy to do that for me. She said she scanned herself every Monday when she was pregnant with the girls until she could feel them move, and she'd be happy to do that for me if I need some reassurance. She said we've invested so much in getting pregnant, that she has no problem doing that if we need/want it. Have I mentioned that I LOVE this woman? She said the spotting (brown) may continue until the clot resolves, and I shouldn't worry about that, but could always get checked if I was concerned. I wish Dr. M had said to me, "you're going to spot off and on until this thing resolves but it's not worrisome unless you've got bleeding like a period." I would have worried still, but wouldn't have freaked out and gotten myself worked up everytime I saw it.

In other news, it's Wednesday. I was supposed to get an IV placed today by another nurse (mine is working), but after no calls, no visits at noon I called the agency at which point they called the nurse who was supposed to come out and she left me a message at 12:30. I called her back, got her voicemail, and told her not to bother because I asked for an early morning appointment since I have to work tonight, and at that point if she came out, got the IV in successfully, I wouldn't have enough time to run the fluids before I needed to get ready for work tonight. My nurse called me back from work this afternoon and the other nurse said she'd left me a message at 8:30 this morning which I told her wasn't true because #1-I was up at 8:30 and none of my phones rang, and #2-when I woke up at noon to pee, and checked my voicemail and phone for missed calls, there weren't any.

My nurse is coming to start my IV tomorrow morning and I'll just run fluids tomorrow myself (guess no getting in the pool for me AGAIN on my day off), and I'll run them again probably Friday afternoon (ultrasound in the morning and lunch plans with a friend I haven't seen in a few months!). I also won't be making it to the pool this weekend since I have to work, and again Monday since I'll have another IV! Oh well. Maybe if I can get my nurse to come really early Wednesday morning to put in another, I can take the one on Monday out after the fluids and actually enjoy my day by making my Jack happy by going to the pool and getting in (not dangling my feet in the water). And I'm off Tuesday (although signed up for OT), so I might get two days out of it. Wednesday I have to be at the Totswap consignment sale by 10am, so I'd have to have the IV put in early, or just bite the bullet, skip swimming and keep the IV in from Monday so I can run fluids in the afternoon. We'll see, play it by ear, but make a tentative plan with my nurse. Wish me good vein luck for tomorrow's IV please!!! Really hard to act like it doesn't hurt in front of your 4 year old who likes to watch!

3rd Ultrasound Results-7 weeks 5 days

I am happy to report that we have one strong bean growing in there. Unlike Jack at this point, the baby is growing a little ahead of schedule (measuring in at 8 weeks this time), where Jack was a little behind schedule by a couple of days. I think it's interesting because while I'm nauseous most of the time with this pregnancy, at this point in my pregnancy with Jack I was throwing up 5-6 times a day. I have yet to do it this pregnancy, but yesterday I came damn close a couple of times.

The baby's heartbeat is clocking in at 153 beats per minute which is perfect. We told Jack yesterday afternoon, and didn't quite get the response we were expecting given as much as he's been talking/asking about a baby, but hey, he's four. Despite not getting the reaction we expected, you could tell he was excited by the way he was bouncing off walls at our celebration dinner last night, and the questions that kept coming about the baby, the constant attempts to kiss the baby through my tummy, etc. throughout the evening. So what I will share on video of me reading the letter "from the baby", and Jack opening his first big brother gift is only the tip of the iceberg. When Archie turned the camera off, Jack was more excited. Guess he felt pressure with the camera on.

Our doc did look to see if he could see a reason for the spotting. He found an area at the bottom of my uterus where he said may be causing it, but that everything around the baby, where the placenta seemed to be starting, etc., all seemed ok and intact. So I can't be happier about that, the spotting seems to just be an annoyance vs. a problem.

Our first OB appointment I explained in a previous post, I had scheduled for this coming Wednesday expecting to be released from the RE. I will have one more ultrasound next Friday at 11:30am and if everything is good, I'll "graduate" as my RE put it, to our OB. The OB's office was closed when we left our ultrasound yesterday, so I'll have to call Monday to reschedule.

Here is the video. And by the way, after the camera was off, he did put the shirt on.

And just so you know, the cat isn't out of the bag at work yet still. I'm still not posting the news to facebook either. I figure when I throw up at work, or it becomes obvious, they'll know. Maybe I can keep it quiet at work until the first trimester is over at least. We'll see.

Kidney Update

So I dragged my weary (not to mention bruised and sore) butt to get my renal ultrasound this morning after I got off from work. The ultrasound tech told me that she didn't see any stones (I didn't expect her to since they've never seen them on ultrasound, only on CT scan). I went up, checked in, and sat in the doctor's office looking through car and golf magazines with Jack while I waited another hour for my doc to arrive and start his day.

He looked at the ultrasound and spoke with the radiologist, and he told me that it could have been a smaller stone that I was able to pass already, or it's moved down further to where they can't see on ultrasound. He said that my kidney looked slightly dilated and that I had the mildest hydronephrosis (he said it's nothing compared to what I had when I had the 2 large stones blocking my ureters). He said that pregnancy can cause hydronephrosis by the uterus getting bigger and naturally causing some obstruction to the ureters, but I told him that the gestational sac was only 1cm on ultrasound, and he said that the uterus is already growing even if the sac isn't that large yet. He told me that I'd have to talk to my OB or RE about what I can take for pain (I am sure it's only tylenol allowed at this point), and that I would kind of have to deal with it at this point. He said the only other option is to put a stent in, and he would have to do it rather blindly since he can only visualize so far with the scope, and it would be a really uncomfortable procedure for me. The stent was difficult to keep in after my surgery 3 years ago and that was only for almost a week (I had to have him remove it because I couldn't stand running to the bathroom every 5 minutes to pee an ounce at a time!). I'll skip that thank you very much!

So, my current plan is to drink as much as I can, as often as I can until I either deliver or get sick (in which case we'll go back to our plan of a long term IV to keep me well hydrated). The doc is supposed to call back in my prescription for my urocit-K which is basically a bunch of lemons packed into some horse pills to keep my pH of my urine alkalinized which makes it harder for me to form stones. I also have to be really careful with my sodium intake as higher sodium is associated with increased stone formation in cystinuria. Yay for me, LOL.

I want to ask my nurse at what point I can use a heat pack on that left part of my back. I've avoided using my heating pad at all because I wasn't sure if that (or my fever, or the two glasses of iced tea I had at dinner one night) had anything to do with why we didn't get pregnant for our fresh cycle, and I'm truly afraid to use it. I really haven't had much back pain until these last few days, so I was doing fine without it, but I'm wondering if I could take a smaller microwaveable heat pack and use that intermittently for this back pain. I'll call her next week and ask.

Thank you for the prayers that everything would be ok. I just continue to pray that this pregnancy will progress normally, and the baby will be healthy. Our next ultrasound is June 6th and Jack will be in school which is fine. I wanted to tell him then, but the office we're going to for the ultrasound is really funny about bringing kids with you (sensitivity to the other IFer's which I totally get). I figure if we see a heartbeat, we can tell him that night, and then our first trimester ultrasound to look at the nuchal translucency (which if I remember right is like 10-12 weeks-ish) we will definitely take him to. The baby will resemble more of a baby/alien then anyway, so it will be more believable to Jack then looking at what resembles a grain of rice on the 6th.

The Last 2 Days

I got quite a scare last night. After going to the bathroom I had really bad (doubled over) pain in my left lower part of my abdomen that radiated to my lower right abdomen and up the left side of my back. It lasted about 20 minutes, and if it hadn't stopped, I would have been convinced that I had an ectopic. After that, I was extremely nauseated and just wanted to throw up (I didn't!). I felt miserable. I finally was able to fall asleep, and that was surprising given the fact that I had our first ultrasound coming up today, but I'd cleaned most of my house yesterday and hadn't had a nap, so I was exhausted.

I woke up this morning and felt better until I got out of bed. Despite munching on some crackers (I was hungry and borderline nauseated), I just felt like yucky. I got up and started to put away laundry and every time I took a deep breathe or bent over, I noticed I was having a dull pain in my left back again. And I was getting more nauseated by the minute. I got to thinking this is probably my stupid cystinuria acting up again, and I probably have another kidney stone. Well, that set me into tears because kidney stones can cause preterm labor and while that's not what I'd really have at this point, it could cause me to miscarry. So I was a bit of a mess this morning to say the least.

I called my urologist, and I am to go in tomorrow morning when I get off of work for a renal ultrasound. The problem with this is that often the ultrasounds won't pick up stones if they are smaller, the CT scans are better for that, but now that I'm pregnant, that isn't an option. Ugh. My doc ordered the ultrasound for stat results back to him which is good because I should have the ultrasound done around 7:30am, and then I'm supposed to go to his office to wait for him. He doesn't usually come in until about 9am (and that is on the rare occassion that he's on time). My only issue with this is that I'm exhausted, I'll have Jack with me (who is supposed to be at school by 8:30am), and all I will be thinking about is my bed, and how I have to get enough sleep to come back into work again at 7pm. Such is life right?!?!

Please pray that if this is a stone, it's passable. I don't want a miscarriage and I don't want a nephrostomy tube (which basically diverts the urine from your kidney to a bag on the outside of your body until the stone is removed). Please pray for this baby to hang in there and grow nice and steady so we can hopefully see it's little heartbeat fluttering away on June 6th.

1st Ultrasound

It looks like one!!! Next ultrasound is June 6th.

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Beta #4 Results

Well, today's beta about quadrupled what it was on Friday. Today's was 5653! It's either one really sticky bean in there, or there's more than one. Up until I got my results today I was convinced that there was only one. Now I'm not so sure. My nurse called and told me that we were done with the bloodwork, I could go ahead and schedule my first OB ultrasound with them for later this week. I said, "Wait, what were the numbers today!?!?" I was expecting 3800, 4100, NOT 5600!!!

I made friends with a girl in our clinic who had a fresh cycle, and was having her day 6 transfer the same day we were. We befriended each other on facebook. Her beta was 1200-something on Friday and was 5000-something today. She had her first ultrasound today and it showed two sacs, but one of them was smaller than the other and may not make it. Please pray for her and her little embryos, as they are both there and she'd like to have them both! Her next ultrasound isn't for 10 days.

My ultrasound is scheduled for Thursday morning at 10:45am. Please pray that how ever many little ones are in there are in the correct place for them to continue to grow for a long 9 months. Please pray that if there are twins, we can get over the shock and begin to make plans for them (and us), and our childcare situation. Please pray they will be healthy and have heartbeats at the ultrasound that will follow this one so we can tell Jack the good news.

Update and Whine with my Cheese :)

I had my appointment today for an ultrasound to check out my lining, and to have blood drawn. My doc said my endometrium looked great, but I needed to clarify for myself (I'm really not dense, but it was one of those mornings since I had been up again half the night worrying as usual) and asked Dr. M if that meant my lining was thick and where it needed to be for transfer and he said it was.

Next I went to sign consents with my nurse. As long as my blood work looked ok, I'd be starting progesterone shots IM daily this coming Sunday night and transfer would be next Friday (May 6th), but I wouldn't know a time until next Thursday when she calls me. I had to ask if I ovulated if my cycle would get cancelled. She said that that would cause us to cancel the cycle and start over, but that my ovaries looked fine and everything looked quiet on my ultrasound. I asked if that meant that I didn't ovulate for sure, and she said that it didn't necessarily mean that, but it was reassuring, that we would know more when my results came back in 4 hours. I know, I was a little over the top this morning, but I was having cramping the other night, and while she said I shouldn't ovulate on the estrogen shots as they would be suppressing me, I ovulated on BCP's AND LUPRON for my fresh cycle, so I was not really trusting my body to do what it's supposed to do.

Another nurse called with my lab results this afternoon and I did not ovulate (round of applause for my body redeeming itself please).

All in all, this was a great day. I heard what I wanted to hear except for when I asked my nurse when I should expect my beta pregnancy test to be. See, I figured if I start progesterone on Sunday to match up with my day 6 transfer being Friday, I figured I could count Sunday as basically my retrieval. With my fresh cycle, my beta was to be 15 days post retrieval. This would mean my beta would be on the 16th. I was cool with this. However, when I asked my nurse today, she said (thinking out loud), "Well, it probably wouldn't be the full two weeks, probably around 12 days, so not the week after your transfer, but like the middle of that week following." If normally it's 15 days after retreival (so in my case like 9 days post transfer), why would it be 12 days after transfer????? One of my bloggy friends just had her transfer, and her beta is 10 days post transfer!

This is my whine with my cheese so to speak. I want what I want when I want it. This is the first time I can honestly say that this die-hard non-POASer may actually bite the bullet and pee on a stick. I just don't know that I'll be able to keep myself from doing it, especially after seeing how much my self control waned this last time. I came darn close to POAS the morning of my beta at my girlfriend's house and the only reason I didn't is because I didn't think I could look at the test myself and call Archie and my mom. I would have needed my friend to look at it for me, and I promised my mom she would be the second to know after Archie. My urologist made me promise he'd be like the third (in all likelihood he'll probably be 40th) so I could have a kidney ultrasound to make sure I don't start the pregnancy off with a stone that will just get worse and possibly cause complications. I figure it will only take me about 10 minutes to text, make calls, post on blogger, and then call him. :-)

Anyway, a great day in general, and I'm just hoping my nurse wasn't thinking straight when she told me she thinks beta would be like 12 days post transfer.

Dreams

My dreams have been really odd lately, but given how I've been feeling and the upcoming cycle, I guess my brain is just in overdrive. The other day during my nap, I had a dream that my mom called me, she had gotten my labwork, and told me that I was pregnant. I wasn't far along-I wasn't sick either. It was nice, and I thought to myself (in my dream), "Man, I better enjoy this for as long as it lasts because I know from experience it may not stay this way!" I said to my mom, "Are you happy, you're the first to know this time, even before me and Archie!" I will explain this comment further below. Anyway, Archie didn't know I was pregnant at this point, and I remember thinking, "When did I start to get sick with Jack...about 5.5 weeks, so I've got a week and a half to figure out a great way to tell him the good news!" It was funny because obviously we'd gotten pregnant on our own or he would have known that I was having bloodwork done to check and see if we were pregnant. I woke up at that point.

When we were doing our IVF cycle with Jack we had our retrieval and found out that beta date would be April 20th. My mom was scheduled for hernia surgery that day, and I was working the night before. I'd heard that I could get my results within a couple hours of my labwork, so I went right after I got off of work and had my blood drawn. Well, my labwork wasn't back in a couple of hours, and my mom said she wanted to be the first to know after Archie of course. This was a problem on multiple levels. My sister was waiting with us in the waiting room, as was my grandfather and one of my aunt's. Anyway, I got the phone call I'd been waiting for from my nurse after 2pm!!! Seriously, that 7 hour wait about killed me! I tried to tell Archie before my sister found out, but he wasn't looking at the card I wrote the note on (I was hiding it behind my sister's laptop so he could see it first). So they found out at the same time. My mom was in the OR, so we couldn't tell her yet, and Archie went off and called his family to tell them, and my family could tell what the results were when they looked over. My mom was basically the last to know, she was very upset. BUT, she was soooo excited! So the whole little comment in my dream stems back to that no doubt. She swears she'd better be first to know besides us this next time, LOL. To be honest, this dream really did make me feel better and more excited about the upcoming cycle. Now I'm ready to go! What a roller coaster.

I had another weird dream yesterday during my nap before work. It was ugly and bad. Basically we were going on an international flight-me, my mom, Jack and Archie. As we were boarding the airline agents kept staring at Archie, it was weird. I asked if there was a problem and they said there wasn't. Once on the plane, they made everyone get off, and go through the process again of checking our ID's, passports, luggage, etc. We go to get back on and again they are staring at Archie. I was so annoyed, I asked if there was a problem, again they said no. My mom is leading the way with Jack to our seats with me and Archie following. We get to our seats only to turn around and see that Archie's being detained a few rows back and as I start walking toward them to find out what's going on, they shoot him! I freak out of course and run to him, turn around to look at my mom who is in complete shock only to realize that Jack is gone. We start screaming and looking for him but we can't find him and no one will tell us what happened to Archie or Jack. Jack woke up from his nap at that point and woke me up, but I was panicked. What is up with that dream?!?!? I'll take more of the pregnancy ones thank you!

As a side note, I went for a routine renal ultrasound today just to check and make sure I don't have any stones brewing before we start this cycle and (hopefully) get pregnant. I swear I am a nurse for a reason and not a radiologist because all I saw when they looked at my kidneys was fetuses inside those kidneys. I obviously have no idea what I'm looking at on those renal ultrasounds, but I think it's undeniable that I have baby on the brain, LOL.