13w4d

I haven't thrown up in almost 2 weeks, how awesome is that?!?! I still have bouts of nausea, although yesterday I thought I was finally over that hump. You see, in the last week I've been taking my zofran once, maybe twice on a bad day. That's a big improvement for me. All of a sudden yesterday it was like a switch was flipped and instead of being nauseated, I was ravenous. No joke, I could have eaten everything I saw (except for the things that repulse me), and still been hungry. Until last night. We had lasagna for dinner, and like I've mentioned before, tomato based things like tomato sauce, just don't sit well with me this pregnancy. I had lasagna a week ago though and it stayed down and I'd even had seconds, so I thought maybe this would be ok. After dinner I debated whether I should have even eaten the lasagna, or if my nausea was because I was still hungry. Then I was dealing with bad heartburn. I didn't eat because until yesterday, small meals stayed down, large meals didn't, and I didn't want to tempt fate. I felt miserable all night, and it took me forever to fall asleep, even after I ate some Tums like they were candy to try and help with the heartburn. I woke up throughout the night with acid reflux that tempted me to throw up, but I didn't. All day today my stomach hasn't been right and I've gagged a few times, threatening to end my NON-THROWING UP streak.

In other news, there is definitely something "there". I can feel it when I try to sit up or bend over. Something popped and hurt like heck the other day when I bent a certain way, and I had cramping and round ligament pain all night that night at work, but that's better thank goodness. But, you can feel how the lower part of my abdomen beneath my belly button is harder, and it definitely doesn't give when I bend over, so there is something growing in there, getting bigger, and I'm noticing the difference. Jack and Archie also notice it and are very affectionate towards the little popsicle. It melted my heart the other night when we were getting ready for bed, and Jack told me he wanted to sing a song to the baby. He seems to be going through a phase where he is getting shy when people watch him, so he told me he didn't want me to "smile, laugh, or look at me" while he did it. I thought to myself, "But you're being so darn cute, that may be impossible" and tried to put on my best poker face and not look at him. He then proceeded to sing in a whisper "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" to my lower belly. I cannot convey how incredibly cute this was. I told him I thought the baby might not have been able to hear his whisper, that he should sing it louder, at which point he said, "Yeah, it can't hear me because it's in your belly!!!" I couldn't figure out how to explain that actually when it's bigger and still in my belly it will be able to hear his voice, so I just told him that I was sure the baby heard him and enjoyed his song, and silently wished I'd never told him that I thought he needed to be louder than a whisper.

I'm still not doing too well with my water intake. I knew I needed more last night after dinner but with my stomach being so sour, I was really afraid to attempt it, and it just continued all night last night and today. I tend to do alot better with my water intake at work and in the heat. My theory is that when it's hot, obviously you get thirsty, but at work in the hospital the air is so dry, and so I am constantly thirsty, and I find that when I leave work in the morning even after 48 ounces of water, my throat feels like I need more. So work isn't necessarily a bad thing for me especially when it comes to needing to drink more.

I see my urologist tomorrow and will discuss stopping the IV fluids next week if everything continues on the path it is, and then my next OB appointment is next Friday, July 29th (also my sister's 29th birthday!). I haven't heard anything from the genetics counselors, so I'm hoping it doesn't mean something is wrong (we heard back in a week with Jack, and we are at 2 weeks now with this one) and they are waiting for my doc to tell me. That said, I hope she has some results from the bloodwork that she can share with us. I'm also curious to find out where my uterus should be measuring. I realize that you get bigger quicker with subsequent pregnancies, but I'm just wondering what is normal at this point. With Jack, she told me at 20 weeks, my uterus should be at my belly button level. It is 1cm beneath that now which is where I was at about 19 weeks with Jack. It has me a little worried, but I'm trying not to worry too much until I can ask my OB if it's normal for a second pregnancy to have my uterus measuring that large. I'm also going to talk to my OB about possibly stopping the fluids and hopefully she and my urologist will both be on board and feel that I'm at a good enough place to do this.

Reassuring Update From the Fabulous Dr. A

I tried calling my OB's office yesterday, but all day long it was the answering service. Guess they took an extra long holiday weekend! But I did finally get through after lunch today and left a message with Dr. A's secretary. In case I haven't mentioned enough how much I love my OB (seriously, I couldn't wait to be pregnant and one of the reasons was so I could go see this woman every couple of weeks), I really do. She is always perky and upbeat, even when you're sitting there feeling like you might just puke on her shoes. She'll even tell you her own stories from when she was pregnant in the hopes of making you feel better. In true fashion she didn't let me down today.

She just called me back, and I explained that I hadn't taken my morning dose of progesterone on Friday because I knew I was having an exam and swabs done (I'm late on my annual exam), and didn't want it to interfere with that, so I had held off, only to crash when I got home from being up for 22 hours, and forgetting to take my evening dose. I explained that Saturday morning I had heavier spotting which did lighten up throughout the day after taking my progesterone. I wanted to know how much spotting I should expect after I finish the progesterone next Tuesday, and at what point I should be concerned enough to call. She told me that since Dr. M had seen a spot on ultrasound that he thought might be where the spotting was coming from it was probably a subchorionic bleed, and that that clot was going to have to leak as it liquified and come out one way or another, and that honestly the missing the progesterone on Friday and spotting that ensued was probably just a fluke because the clot has to dissolve and come out anyway. She said that the progesterone takes over between 8 and 10 weeks, so the progesterone I'm taking now (or lack thereof, I should say) isn't what caused the spotting, it's probably just this clot dissolving.

As far as when I should be concerned-if it's red bleeding like a period, then I need to be seen for sure. She said she's there Monday to Friday and if I need a sanity check, she'd be happy to do that for me. She said she scanned herself every Monday when she was pregnant with the girls until she could feel them move, and she'd be happy to do that for me if I need some reassurance. She said we've invested so much in getting pregnant, that she has no problem doing that if we need/want it. Have I mentioned that I LOVE this woman? She said the spotting (brown) may continue until the clot resolves, and I shouldn't worry about that, but could always get checked if I was concerned. I wish Dr. M had said to me, "you're going to spot off and on until this thing resolves but it's not worrisome unless you've got bleeding like a period." I would have worried still, but wouldn't have freaked out and gotten myself worked up everytime I saw it.

In other news, it's Wednesday. I was supposed to get an IV placed today by another nurse (mine is working), but after no calls, no visits at noon I called the agency at which point they called the nurse who was supposed to come out and she left me a message at 12:30. I called her back, got her voicemail, and told her not to bother because I asked for an early morning appointment since I have to work tonight, and at that point if she came out, got the IV in successfully, I wouldn't have enough time to run the fluids before I needed to get ready for work tonight. My nurse called me back from work this afternoon and the other nurse said she'd left me a message at 8:30 this morning which I told her wasn't true because #1-I was up at 8:30 and none of my phones rang, and #2-when I woke up at noon to pee, and checked my voicemail and phone for missed calls, there weren't any.

My nurse is coming to start my IV tomorrow morning and I'll just run fluids tomorrow myself (guess no getting in the pool for me AGAIN on my day off), and I'll run them again probably Friday afternoon (ultrasound in the morning and lunch plans with a friend I haven't seen in a few months!). I also won't be making it to the pool this weekend since I have to work, and again Monday since I'll have another IV! Oh well. Maybe if I can get my nurse to come really early Wednesday morning to put in another, I can take the one on Monday out after the fluids and actually enjoy my day by making my Jack happy by going to the pool and getting in (not dangling my feet in the water). And I'm off Tuesday (although signed up for OT), so I might get two days out of it. Wednesday I have to be at the Totswap consignment sale by 10am, so I'd have to have the IV put in early, or just bite the bullet, skip swimming and keep the IV in from Monday so I can run fluids in the afternoon. We'll see, play it by ear, but make a tentative plan with my nurse. Wish me good vein luck for tomorrow's IV please!!! Really hard to act like it doesn't hurt in front of your 4 year old who likes to watch!

Good Intentions

I had perfectly good intentions of posting for Father's Day on here. However, I was feeling really crappy, but we had a relatively nice day. We went to church where I almost embarassed myself in the parking lot by throwing up. You see, Archie was running late for church (as usual), and came out in flip flops. He then changed into his dress shoes, and as we were getting out of the car, I said something smelled awful, but thought it was something hidden in the brush near where we'd parked. When we came out from church, and I opened the door, the smell overwhelmed me and I was gagging and saying that horrific smell was coming from my car! I looked to see what was in there that hadn't been when I originally got into the van that morning, and picked up Archie's flip flops to smell them. Oh yeah, that was it, they got put into the church dumpster right then and there while I threatened to throw up in the parking lot. Archie couldn't even smell the stench until he put the shoes up to his nose, but evidently, my pregnancy nose is in overdrive. Lovely.

I continued with my sour stomach at the mall (Jack thought Daddy needed a new hat and new flip flops for Father's Day), and then on our way to lunch with my in-laws. When we got to the restaurant, Jack and I both needed to use the restroom, so I took him with me. Well, when we walked into the restroom, I noticed a musty smell. I brought my shirt up to cover my nose as I was already starting to wretch, but it didn't work. And I had a full bladder. Yup, threw up in the toilet, and thank goodness I had on a pantiliner, because I went myself too. Damn. Then when I went to flush Jack's toilet (he's always afraid it will be loud), I threw up again. I did manage to eat a little lunch, but felt like crud the rest of the day.

Feeling like crud has become my norm. If I'm not nauseous, then I am either wretching, or darn close to it. This hasn't been good because it means I'm snacking (usually on crackers) throughout the day and I'm probably eating one full meal a day (and pared down at that because I can't fill my stomach up like I was when I wasn't pregnant, or I'm running to the toilet). As far as drinking goes, it's either water or ginger ale. Sprite isn't sitting well these days, and to be honest, in a good day where I'm just nauseous, I'm on a steady diet of ginger ale, some water, and tums because fluids just seem to cause me to have bad indigestion which of course, isn't good when you already feel like you're going to be sick. So, my normal fluid intake in a day is about 2 cans of ginger ale, and usually about a 17 oz bottle of water, unless I'm at work when I might take in 20 oz of water if I'm feeling pretty good and it's not talking back.

I called my urologist on Wednesday because I wanted to let him know about the amount of water vs. ginger ale, and make sure that the amount of ginger ale I'm drinking counted towards my fluid intake. He wants water, without all the added sugar. He asked how long I've been drinking like that and I told him probably about 2 weeks. I was trying not to call him as I have an appointment with him in a few more weeks, and with my OB next week, and I could tell from my skin that I wasn't "dehydrated", and I certainly wasn't as sick as I was with Jack. He called me back at 4pm and wanted me to get a PICC line put in to keep my fluid status up so I'm not making stones, and in order to do that, I needed to make 3 liters of urine a day, which I won't be with 32 ounces of fluid intake a day. He called the doc covering for my OB (who is on vacation this week) and was up in arms about what he wants. The other OB called me and said she'd rather have me come into L&D and get tanked up with 3-4 liters of fluid and some iv zofran (I threw up 4 times on Wednesday, but that was the first time since Father's Day), and see how I feel in the morning and go from there. I told her that was fine, and thus, found myself admitted for 24 hours. I was sent home last night after they set up home health to come and put in IV's to give me fluids on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. The original plan was to have someone come as needed on days when I'm not making enough urine, but none of the home care agencies thought they'd be able to staff well enough to guarantee someone would be able to come out to start an IV and tank me up. So, today is supposed to be my first appointment (however, I have yet to hear from anyone about a time, and am waiting for them to open so I can ask what the plan is) for a liter of fluids before I go into work. The hospital sent me home with my IV still in, and some saline to flush the line with in the hopes that I wouldn't have to be stuck again, and then I'll just pull the line myself before I head into work. This will work out well at the times when I'm not working the nights between home care appointments because it means as long as I keep the line patent, they won't have to stick me again.

I have no idea the plan for how long this is going to continue, I assume it will continue until I can take in enough fluids myself to keep my urine output up and stones away. I imagine that my secret at work will be out shortly because between the tape marks (you know how it gets dirty around the edges and isn't easy to get off the skin) and needing IV sticks (which will leave little scabs resembling track marks probably), the jig will be up. Oh well, I'm almost 10 weeks and if I can't keep it quiet until 12, then now is just as well I guess.